Day Three Hundred and Forty-two - Chrome Shelled Regios: Episodes 1-4, "I... I have no idea what's going on."

I try and give every anime that shows up on Netflix a chance.

If you've been following Couchbound for a while, you've probably noticed that there are precious few titles of any quality. I've covered a few, but most of them are stinkers and they're pretty much all courtesy of Funimation. I think I could count on my hands the ones that are actually worth it.

Still, you have to give a series and/or movie the benefit of the doubt. There's no such thing as "once burned, twice shy" when it comes to media. One day an author/director/producer is making crap, the next it's genius or vice versa, see Michael Bay for the latter.

Anyways, I think I must sadly report that Chrome Shelled Regios isn't a sterling example of anything. I'm pretty sure it's not the worst title available on the Instant Stream, but it's not that great.

For one thing, I don't think the author (or adapters) know how to tell a compelling story. I could be very wrong, considering that the light novel series that the anime is based of off is a moderate success with over 20 volumes and 4.5 million copies sold. Would that I had those numbers. Still, just looking at the first four episodes of the series, I have absolutely NO idea what is really going on and find nothing all that nifty about the main characters... or the side characters... or the flashback characters.

Yeah... there are a LOT of characters.

Take, for instance, the nominal leads... there's Layton, Nina, and Felli. They're all major archetypes, particularly connected to manga culture. Layton is the wandering hero trying to escape his past through gentleness, Nina is the weak child trying to become a strong (but, ultimately, brittle) adult, and Felli is the silver-haired silent Hime (princess) with no emotional affect. It's a role I've seen dozens of times before and done much better elsewhere: Rei in Neon Genesis Evangelion, Nagato Yuki in The Melancholy of Suzumiya Haruhi.

Then there are the side characters... the over protective brother, the ladies' man rake, the trio of energetic girls (one of whom has a doomed crush on the lead). Bleh. Each and every one of them is an obvious trip down character creation lane (Yay, Central Casting!) and each and every one of them is boring as hell.

Finally, there are the flashback characters... who only start showing up in episode 3 for random bits of poorly voice acted drama/action. That means something, coming from me, just how bad the voice acting is... because it's all in English (while the dystopia scenes are all in Japanese with English subtitles). Really, really BAD English. I can't tell if it's just the way of things, that they'll never cast actual native speakers... or if Japanese audiences just wouldn't believe the sounds coming out of our mouths are true language and prefer to hear the gargling emanations of non-fluent pronunciations.

Speaking of the flashbacks, they're confusing as hell. So far they seem to hint that they're happening in our modern day or perhaps the not too distant future, but certainly not the post-apocalyptic deserts of the main storyline where everyone lives in mobile cities and train to skirmish with competing cities for the dwindling resources of the planet. The flashbacks are all black and white (well, purple and white) and horrible.

There are just too many stories going on at once for you to keep track of. Is it a martial drama about Layton's new platoon and how he fits in as a hidden prodigy? Is it a survival story about humanity defeating genetically mutated fiends? What the heck is going on with Layton's girlfriend from his previous town and why is a perverted sexy-gal archetype so interested in her. For that matter, why is the sexy-gal type forcing a devoted follower to hold her throne in her absence?

WHAT IS GOING ON?

I think I would've dropped the series already if I didn't find the occasional gags from Felli to be amusing. There are moments where the art style of her scenes goes into chibi dimensions and it's moe as hell (if you don't know, google). Still, those little moments of awkward humanity and cuteness aren't enough to pull me in, I think, and I'll probably bow out soon... if not right now.

The series has a very steep climb if it's going to survive in my queue... and very little time to do it in. I might give it one more chance, but if it doesn't get any better, I'm out.

Until tomorrow, Potatoes~

Day Two Hundred and Thirty-eight - Dredd, "Now THIS is what modern action movies should be."

Came down with a bit of the ague today, so I took a sick day... much to the annoyance of my boss, no doubt... and, while it was unfortunate for my daily routine it was rather fortunate for my Netflix queue as, thanks to the guy trimming the hedges around the apartments with a chainsaw, I wasn't able to sleep away my sickness.

So, on to today's Couchbound pick, which just happened to be newly released on the Instant Stream, and it was Karl Urban's take on Dredd.

No, not the 90's Stallone vehicle that was more comical farce than gritty scifi dystopia, this version of Dredd never takes off the mask and is all business, all "The Law," all of the time... and I find myself much happier for it, very glad there's no Sly or Rob Schneider.

Set in the vast urban sprawl of Megacity One after the fall of society thanks to nuclear war, Dredd follows the eponymous Judge, Jury, and Executioner on an assessment tour for rookie beat Judge Anderson (Olivia Thirlby), a powerful psychic who is being pushed into service despite failing her entrance exams.

The two of them are sent to a Megablock Tower called Peach Trees where three gangbangers were tossed off a ledge from hundreds of stories up. While investigating the murders, they happen upon a mid-level banger who could ruin his gang's whole operation and that sets into motion a total lockdown of the Tower on the orders of the gang's vicious leader, Ma-ma (Lena Headey).

From there, the movie is one blood-soaked battle after another as the two isolated Judges try to survive wave after wave of bullets, bangers, and even a few corrupt Judges called in during act three to fight fire with fire.

To say that I love this film is an understatement. It's brutal without being gratuitous, stylistic without being heavy-handed, and full of subtle little touches that cause the comic book geek in me to squeal in delight.

I mean, honestly, seeing Anderson pause at that "No Muties" graffiti for half a second before moving on with the mission is a tremendously well done nod to the status quo of Megacity One. Such a perfect little humanizing moment for her (ironic, considering) and one that isn't lost as her Mutant status is used to great effect during several key scenes.

It's not a perfect movie... as there are no leads or subtle hints to the corrupt judges at any point previous to the moment Ma-ma sends for them during the second to third act transition, but I'm willing to forgive a few oversights considering how well placed other running themes and clues were laid out... particularly concerning her mousey tech genius (Domhnall Gleeson).

When it comes to effects, pretty much all of the gunplay is spot on, with even the normally laughable CGI bloodspray being really quite believable. The same can be said for the high-speed camera effects that pop up several times during the movie as the visual high of the drug Slo-Mo that the Ma-ma clan is producing. While you can't see it as much on the Stream, the 3D version that I saw in theaters was just that much more dazzling.

Last, but not least, I really want to point out Urban's portrayal of Dredd. I think he very much embodied the spirit of the character. Whereas Stallone was always "Sly in Dredd's Uniform" (and, even then, only for a small portion of the movie before he's disgraced and defrocked), Urban most definitely wears the mantle so well that I never saw him as Karl Urban... only as the man, the monolith, Judge Dredd. Much kudos to him.

If you're any kind of fan of action, I'd very much recommend Dredd to you... especially over tongue-in-cheek, almost parody movies like The Expendables. Dredd gives you everything you want from an actioner and never lets up. I really hope that it's cult status and DVD sales will lead to a sequel, cause I'd rather have one from Urban, et al., than yet another Riddick.

Until tomorrow, Potatoes~