Day Three Hundred and Fifty-five - The Polar Express, "Starring: Tom Hanks, Tom Hanks, Eddie Deezen, and Tom Hanks."

Sometimes is a little difficult to stretch an entire 100-minute film from a holiday picture book. Still, Tom Hanks and Robert Zemeckis wanted to try. The result was the 2004 mo-capped CGI film, The Polar Express, which tells the tale of a boy who has grown cynical with the idea of Santa at the North Pole and falls asleep Christmas night only to be awoken by the magical Polar Express. It travels the world (or, at least, the English-speaking world) to gather up children not unlike himself for a trip to visit Santa before he takes his globe-spanning journey in the hopes that they'll believe once again.

Maybe I'm just as cynical s person, myself, but the small adventures and assorted characters that the boy meets along the way are contrived and paper-thin with absolutely no complexity. Hero Boy is a hero, risking life and limb to help others. Leader Girl is a leader, of course, connected and inspiring those around her, and Know-it-all Boy is whiny Eddie Deezen, whose nasally nerdish voice cuts through the very fabric of my suspension of disbelief and reminds me more of WarGames and Dexter's Lab than the annoying CGI kid he plays.

For it's era, The Polar Express is a fairly plodding narrative told through dazzling effects. Sure, the humans still aren't quite right either in form or motion, and it probably would've been a much more entertaining film if it was live action with decent child actors, but the landscapes and architecture are tremendously beautiful. While I can't get behind any of Tom Hanks' many, many roles and Michael Jeter's performances as the two engineers are blah and silly, it's nice to have both of them along for the ride... especially Jeter, may he rest in peace.

I think, aside from Deezen, my biggest complaint is the last minute cameo by Steven Tyler as an elf version of himself, rocking out after Santa's departure to deliver toys to all the good children of the world during the climax. I had visions of Revolution X and Armageddon. It was a horrible nightmare pastiche of guns and animal crackers.

Still, for all of it's many faults, The Polar Express does have a sweet message... that they beat you over the head with... but kids are dumb, so I guess it was necessary (no, they're not and no, it wasn't). Also, there was an elf in a bicorn hat. Hilarious. Could've done without the ghost, though. I don't believe that I'll ever look back on The Polar Express fondly as a Christmas Classic, but I also don't think I was all that much the worse for watching it. Could've been much better, but also much worse.

Until tomorrow, Potatoes~

10!

Day Three Hundred and Sixteen - Lego Marvel Superheroes: Maximum Overload, "You know what? It's not bad."

Despite the fact that The Lego Movie trailers have been looking more and more cute and entertaining, currently available Lego-brand series like Ninjago and Clutch Powers haven't exactly kindled the strongest feelings of confidence within me.

Still, I've been on a Marvel kick lately thanks to Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. and Thor: The Dark World and seeing folks play the video game for Lego Marvel Superheros has kind of intrigued me, so I decided to give Maximum Overload a shot... and, you know what? It's actually pretty cute.

To be sure, it's definitely vanilla and dumbed down, relying on sight gags like Wolverine kebab claws and meta in-jokes like Spiderman's angst runs, but there are quite a few clever moments and never do I feel like the properties are being exploited too much. Sure, there's no way in hell that Lego Loki has the charisma of Tom Hiddleston, nor do Tony and Pepper strike the right chord in their dynamic that I'm familiar with both from the movies and the comics, but Spidey is pretty spot on concerning his quips and it all feels much closer to the current run of Ultimate Spiderman when it comes to the television universes.

I'm also kind of impressed that the female characters aren't sexualized like their comic and movie counterparts. Yeah, it's a little hard to do that sort of thing visually, considering the trapezoidal boxes that comprise all Lego figures (aside from Hulk and Abomination), even if they still have painted on cleavage, but there aren't any written gags that trivialize them as sex objects either and that's something of an accomplishment, I think... even in kid friendly entertainment.

I also like how short it is. Clocking in a twenty-two minutes, it moves quickly from scene to scene, giving Loki time to annoy quite a few parties in the Marvel universe before being easily thwarted by the arrival of his brother, Thor, who can fill in the blanks via first-hand exposition.

Finally, I think I should mention the little gags. Whether it's the red 'Exit' sign in Loki's ice palace or "Code Five, no Six," there are just the right amount of silly jokes and asides that make this tiny commercial for the game (and, let's face it, that's what it is) actually palatable on its own and really rather effective as advertising. I do have the urge to buy the game now that I've seen this short little episode, in the hope that the relatively catchy writing and humor carries over.

If you're looking for anything deep, keep scrolling as there are most assuredly better offerings available on the Instant Stream, even when it comes to comic properties, but for fans of the Marvelverse looking for light fare and parents looking to introduce their younger children to comic book movies, Maximum Overload is right up your alley.

Until tomorrow, Potatoes~

Day Three Hundred and Fifteen - Exile: Episode 1, "Conspiracy, Disease, Family, Homecoming."

Holy Crap! This one snuck up on me!

Such a busy day with so much to do and so little time to do it in, I still managed to tear myself away from work and other responsibilities to sit down to Chinese takeout and Exile from BBC One... and man, was it worth it.

The opening moments have you reeling from a career and, well, life thrown down the toilet when main character Tom (John Sim) must flee his posh existence in London and return to the country where his sister is caring for their Alzheimer's-affected father (Jim Broadbent). While he's there, old demons haunt him amid the new realities of caring for his demented father and the story becomes one of reopening old wounds while dealing with the new ones.

Let me first say that this is some powerfully compelling storytelling. Tom is no saint and its established very early on how complex and flawed his character is. The same is eventually revealed about his father through a combination of flashbacks and present day revelations.

Stretching the moments between are rather poignant bits of weakness and connection as Tom hooks up with an old acquaintance, realizes she's married to his old best mate from school, and has to deal with the fallout of that while trying to piece together a mystery that begins to present itself in the form of old memories, taped confessions, and a steady stream of payments nobody knows anything about in hidden bank accounts.

This is really good television, and I'll be shocked if it doesn't get play over here in the States. It's on Netflix, now, of course, but I haven't heard of it turning up on BBC America yet or PBS (I'll have to search for that later).

The cinematography is pretty high grade, almost feature-level, and the acting is quite tremendous... especially from its two leads. I think I'd love Jim Broadbent in anything, but I'm pretty convinced by his portrayal of Alzheimer's (save for a bit of awkwardness in the beginning that comes off a little rehearsed). Still, kudos to him and John Simm who has just as much, if not more, intensity when it comes to his par.

If you haven't seen Exile and are looking for smart and emotive drama that plays with both ethics and family ties, check it out immediately. One of the best shows I've seen in a long time.

Until tomorrow, Potatoes~

Day One Hundred and Seventy-one - Toys, "Less about the Toyman and more about his Villain"

There's something so perfect about Toys.

It has just the right amount of whimsy coupled with actual drama, but done in a way that is accessible to folks of all ages.

Set in a fictional toy factory that appears to be run by Willy Wonka's Californian cousins, Toys is nominally the tale of how Robin Williams' character Leslie, as the son of the late owner, discovers his scheming uncle's plans to make war machines out of toys and soldiers out of kids... at least, on the surface.

Watching it now, the movie feels more like a depiction of Uncle Leland (Michael Gambon) and his slow descent into madness as he goes from broken warhorse to reluctant CEO to power mad Lord of War, a would be weapons manufacturer for the new age of modern miniaturized combat. I have to laud Gambon's performance as a REMF who's way past his prime trying to apply cold war principles to a modern company. He and Joan Cusack are the highlights of the film.

That's not to say that Robin Williams isn't fun and masterful, but he's pretty much brilliant in anything he does. Cusack, though, as the eccentric yet insightful robot sister and Gambon as their familial foil just make my day.

I also enjoy LL Cool J as their cousin, Patrick. While it's not the most inspired acting I've seen, it's still a fun role for him. I just wish they'd established the impetus for his third act turn a bit more firmly. His relationship to his grandfather's nurse comes out of nowhere just so she can drop a bomb on him and force a camp switch.

Now that I think about it, my only regret is that there wasn't enough room for Robin Wright's Gwen to really spread her wings in the piece. She's really just a convenient love interest for Leslie and doesn't seem to serve any real purpose. Supposedly she's there to force him to grow up, but I have to say that I see very little difference between pre-Gwen Leslie and post.

Getting off the actors and onto the message, I really like how prescient the film is concerning the current trend in warfare.

Way back in 1992, Barry Levinson and Valerie Curtin called it with unmanned drones becoming the vanguard of our armed forces. While I've yet to see the real boots on the ground being replaced by shin-high mini-tanks en masse, aerial drones certainly have a much higher public profile that I think the government would like... and remote controlled bomb and ground surveillance drones and the like are present in most theaters now.

Also, the factory itself... I swear that Google looked to Toys and Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory for their inspiration.

Toys is a great film that I don't think would be made today, considering what most studios are passing for live-action family entertainment nowadays. The closest we could ever get to the whimsy would be Pixar, I think... and their messages are more universal and less on the nose, which is good.

Finally, the Mtv sequence? Brilliant!

Until tomorrow, Potatoes~

Day One Hundred and Sixty-seven - The Muppet Movie, "Awww, sweet, sweet nostalgia... plus Mel Brooks!"

I don't think I'll ever get tired of The Muppets.

There may be days I'm not really in the mood for their wholesome, sometimes subversive family entertainment, but I would much prefer them to pretty much any kids oriented film, brand, or series in existence.

Ever.

Nominally telling the tale of how The Muppets got started in showbiz, The Muppet Movie plops the viewer right in the middle of its self-referential humor by opening with the Muppets themselves screening their own movie for the first time, with Robin the Frog innocently asking if the film really is the truth of their start to his uncle Kermit.

"Approximately," is his reply... and it's that kind of whimsy that I just love about the movie and The Muppets as a whole.

As the film progresses, we treated to the first meetings of most of the main Muppet Show crew, including Kermit, Fozzy, Gonzo, Miss Piggy, and (my favorites) Dr.Teeth and The Electric Mayhem.

Additionally, there are guest spots from so very many great comedians and movie stars from the aforementioned Mel Brooks to Bob Hope, Madeline Kahn, Edgar Bergen, and more!

While each human actor only makes brief appearances, as with most Muppet Show themed movies, just having them there, contributing to the sweet whimsy that are The Muppets, is tremendously endearing. Seeing Orson Welles stare down The Muppets and Steve Martin rudely serve Kermit and Piggy at the very least will illicit a smile.

That's not to say the film doesn't have its weaknesses.

The Doc Hopper subplot is a bit too dumbed down for my tastes, despite Charles Durning's perfectly acceptable turn as a stereotypical villain only out for himself. As a conflict, it intersects with the main narrative of following one's dreams too often and to too little effect, especially in the third act when Hopper hires a frog assassin.

Then there are the minor troubles within The Muppets, mainly concerning Piggy and Kermit. Their second act dinner date that ends with a small action sequence (with Mel Brooks!) ends on way to huge a downer that is basically ignored five minutes later when the boys find her again on the road, Miss Piggy having abandoned Kermit after getting a commercial gig right after she saves them both from Hopper's thugs. There's absolutely no explanation as to why she's hitchhiking and no mention of her commercial ever again.

It was just jarringly weird.

For one last weakness, I have to call attention to the songs. While I adore both the opening and closing versions of Rainbow Connection and Moving Right Along, the rest of the soundtrack is boring and uninspired.

Still, the movie's strengths outweigh those criticisms pretty handily. It is overall very entertaining and its penchant for puns and plays on both words and situations is just too delightful not to love. It's cute, irreverent, and altogether adorable, being worth the watch both for the nostalgia and the good, old fashioned family fun.

I just wish the message of following one's dreams wasn't drowned out by the silliness.

Until tomorrow, Potatoes~